That's Me

That's Me

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Adventures in Eddi Land

Hey. I'm in Disney Land. Without children. Did you know that when you say that to strangers they give you a very funny look. And the bolder type of strangers say things like, "What kind of parents are you??" Well, obviously the kind that like to take vacations & photoshop their kids' heads next to Mickey so that years down the road we can look shocked & say, "What, you don't remember going to Disney Land when you were 12? You should have that memory problem looked into."

Actually, hubby's work sent him here for conferences & they told him he could bring his wife or I told them they didn't have a choice but to include me, I don't remember. Making it a family vacation wasn't an option. But don't think for a second that I'm not going to ask Mickey to put his arm around an imaginary child so that I can take a picture & then photoshop each child into place. Not my fault none of them will have memories of this vacation--they're going in the family scrap book as such.

To all you crazy stalker/stealing stuff types: you're out of luck. I have a house sitter on PMS with a gun & instructions to shoot first & ask later, a crabby Watson G. who is looking for his Mommy, and all the valuables are at my other house with Gerard Butler.

I must announce that I FLEW here. Here's proof:
 Proof #1: I would NOT willingly sit for fun for 4 hours with my legs at this angle due to the leg room being shorter than the length of my femur. And look at's a book! With trivial nonsense that I don't have to take a test on! And my backpack full of non-nonsense books, peeking out from the seat in front of me as a reminder that I have to study for finals at some point.
Proof #2: Not many things in life make me speechless & this view was one of them.

You may not understand what a big deal that is until I tell you that I have spent my entire adult life terrified of planes. People would tell me, "Flying is safer than driving." Okay, great, but it's not the flying that scares me so I'm sick of hearing it. I'm not scared of the crashing while flying so I don't want to hear about the statistics one more time. I'm scared of the plane. Period. Why? Because...well, that's what makes it a 'phobia'; there doesn't need to be an explanation. I get panic attacks when near planes. I get panic attacks when seeing them flying overhead. I went to EAA museum with one of my kids' classes for a field trip; my first time up close to a plane. I figured, "Eh, they're going to be quiet, not moving...I'll be fine." Yeah. No. That's how I learned my phobia has nothing to do with the flying part.

I am not one who lets my fears hold me back. There's nothing in this life that will hold me back from achieving anything I have planned for myself, stupid panic-causing, paralyzing, heart pounding phobias included. So I got on a plane. And then another one. And I got from Wisconsin to California. At 32 years old I won a battle over one of my biggest (still working on the biggest) fears & I am proud to say that I actually love flying.

I found turbulence to be funny. Especially when I was in the restroom. I had just walked into the tiny little cubicle backwards & shut the door when I got thrown forward against the door, then to the left to the sink, and then down on top of the toilet. With as tiny as those rest rooms are, this all happened without me taking a step. The guy outside the door asked, "You okay in there after all that?" I'm not sure if he heard me being tossed around, just figured I had been, or heard me laughing.

I just said yes but what I really wanted to say was, "Dude, you gotta try that!" There is nothing like trying to stand back up to unbutton your jeans while feeling completely weightless & being tossed around. I can tell you that it takes quite a bit of effort to unfasten a button when you have no control over which way your body sways. It's pretty awesome.

Hubby didn't agree. He thinks turbulence is scary. Silly boy.

A note to you people in Orange County: you are seriously nuts. If people drove like this in Wisconsin they'd either get their ass brake checked or a redneck would welcome them to the state by introducing them to his .22.

Oh. My. Lanta. There were times on the drive from the airport to the resort that I seriously saw my life flash before my eyes. All the work that my new doctor has done to fix my neck & back is completely undone, after one 45 minute drive just from being so tense. Oh, and the 45 minute drive was basically just to go 10 miles.

I will not be surprised if the stress of that drive sends me into another Shingles flare. Seriously.

Our shuttle driver found it amusing & said, "Welcome to Orange County driving" when I grabbed hubby's thigh as if it was an emergency brake. Hubby said it wouldn't be as amusing if I'd grabbed 3" over. If we hadn't survived the drive he wouldn't need what's 3" over anyway, so I didn't see why he was worried.

People switch lanes here as if there's not someone already in it. Just drive right into the other vehicle seems to be the motto. And whatever happened to that thing where you stop a few paces behind the vehicle in front of you? Oh, no, here you don't stop until you're in said vehicle's back seat. It's like everyone here is so friendly that they just can't wait to meet you so they climb into your vehicle...while they're still in theirs.

We survived & now I get to study for finals (after I finish my book) next to a pool in weather that I'm enjoying just a wee bit...
My I Have a Plan face..."Mom & Dad are always saying how they love time with the kids & the kids are having fun with them right now...why not give them all more time with each other? We could visit the kids once in a while..."

No comments:

Post a Comment

Come on, spill what you're thinkin'...