That's Me

That's Me

Friday, October 25, 2013

How About a Splash of Water with Your Mud?

While we had a lot of fun at the 2nd Annual Princess Mud Run, it was not without a near, almost, could-have-been tragic ending.

By tragic I mean my death.

Thankfully it ended up just being near, almost, & could have been, because that means I'm still alive to make this world a better place with the presence of Queen Eddi.

They had added new obstacles this year, which was great. More obstacles means less  boring beautiful walking/running through the lovely WI autumn scenery. The event is held at a nature center, so there is a lot of lovely scenery but I didn't pay $130.00 for us to take a lovely stroll.

What we didn't think of was that some of these obstacles just may contain latex. And if any of us on the team had thought of that possibility, we would have surely thought an epi-pen was in order. I had a handy dandy little baggie stuffed in my bra for other essentials we may need during the run, but hadn't even thought of taking that precious life-saving device out of my purse to also stick in my bra.

It wasn't until after I was off of the bounce house-style climbing obstacle, that we realized our mistake. Just before we had gotten up to that first obstacle, I kept saying my lungs felt like they were closing on me. I just couldn't catch a good breath. I had just encountered 682 miles up a 45° incline okay, the mileage may be off by just a wee bit since the total run was 5K but the incline was totally that but this was different. It wasn't from that, I couldn't explain it, but I just knew it was different.

As soon as the rash appeared...the unique rash we've seen many times before & only when I've come in near-contact or contact with latex...we knew.

The next medical station was 1/2 a mile away. The people managing the obstacles in between did not have anything medical. I decided to keep pushing through because, well, I don't have wings to make me fly to help. Though having wings would be totally awesome. I could avoid traffic, leave for work later 'cause in my world wings make me go 100x faster, & I would mean it when I told someone that I "flew right over." Wait...I'm afraid of anything with wings & feet so would I also be afraid of myself? Something new for me to ponder. A fear of one's own self would not be enjoyable in the least. I must weigh out the pros & cons here.

But back to latex threatening to kill me.

If I can wash the parts of me that touch latex, I can usually halt the reaction from becoming so severe that I stop breathing. This is the #1 reason you will always see me carrying hand sanitizer. I am obsessed with cleanliness but I am more obsessed with living. None of us had hand sanitizer or water on us. When we saw a porta-potty I ran to it all excited that there would be sanitizer in it. I ran up like a crazy port-potty loving fool & ripped that door right off its hinges to get inside to the sanitizer. I leaped at that sanitizer like it was pumpkin cheesecake, which is the best thing on Earth, ever.

Imagine my sad, depressed, shattered feelers when I pushed the button & not a drop came out. Not. A. Drop. Desperate for some hand sanitizer, I pushed that button again harder & growled at it. Not that that worked, but it felt good to do it.

To my right magically appeared a water station. 2 angels directly from Heaven with a golden light directly above the cups of water that they were handing to fellow runners. When I asked the ladies for a couple of big cups of water to pour on myself, they looked rather...astonished?...confused?...bewildered?...horrified?...unsettled?...confudled?...those all work here. It was only 50-some degrees out, I wasn't sweating, & I'm sure they thought I was absolutely nuts to want to pour ice cold water anywhere on my body.

I handed a cup to hubby & said, "You got this?" I didn't say what I wanted him to do, but he's so good, he can read my mind. It's quite scary sometimes actually, that he has this ability to know what I'm thinking. Scary for him.

Before I shut my eyes tight I saw the evil grin start to spread across his face. Oh, dear Lord, why did I give him that cup of water? I held my breath & waited for the cold water to hit my face.

As the water barely hit my right ear, because in his excitement he missed, I heard the Water Ladies & several other runners gasp. I looked at them & said, "It's the only way I have to get the latex that I'm deathly allergic to off my face." That's when Water Ladies pretty much panicked. It was kinda difficult for the one Water Lady to pour water with shaking hands & she needed help from the other lady to not spill 5 gallons of ice cold water all over herself.

I handed that very large cup of water to hubby & again saw that evil grin. I held my breath. I didn't have to wait long for the icy water to slam into my poor, already cold face. Well, if I wasn't already awake in the brisk air & after running up a crappy hill, I was now.

As I panted, trying to recover from the shock, allowing water to drip off of my eyelashes, I hear, "I've been waiting 3 years to do that." What a sweet man. I'm sure he meant he has waited that long to be a hero & save my life in some fashion, not that he deeply enjoyed splashing water in my face without any threat of payback.

Hubby's only saving grace was that he let me wipe my face off with the inside of his shirt. The inside of it, because the outside was not only covered in mud, but had also touched the latex nightmare.

Thankfully, the water helped. The rash on my face went away, my breathing returned to normal, & best of all, I didn't die. Who knew that a mud run could be deadly?

"Thank you for throwing water in my face, dear."
"Any time, sweetie."
"I'm sure."

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