Job Security: My Kids' Shrink

If you don't know what you want to be when you grow up, do I have a job for you. One that will keep you well-fed for years & years. When my kids become adults, they're going to need an amazing therapist.

Last night hubby told 12 year old daughter to go feed the fish. "But only let Manhattan eat," he said.

"But Sunrise needs to eat too."

"No," he assured her, "Sunrise ate earlier. Now it's Manhattan's turn. Keep the food on the left side of the tank 'cause that's Manhattan's side."

12 year old goes to do as she's told. She's always happy to do anything that has to do with the pets or her oldest sister. And since the fish are her oldest sister's pets, she practically skipped over to the tank.

She comes back & with a perplexed look says, "I can't keep Sunrise away from the food."

Me: "Get back in there! Don't let Sunrise eat! He can't eat again. Only let Manhattan eat."

She's gone for a little bit & returns kinda worried, "I keep swishing the food onto the left side & pushing Sunrise out of there but it's impossible to keep him away from the food. When I push him, the food moves with the water. When I push the food to the left, Sunrise swims in too." All the while she's demonstrating for us with her hands. One hand is swishing around in the invisible tank while her other hand is shooing away a wily little fish who just won't obey.

Me: "Well, did you put the food on your left or the fish's left?"

Daughter: "Um...my left."

Us: "That's the problem! Get back in there! Quick! Put the food on the fish's left!"

She disappeared. Came back after a little while. "Which left? I don't know which left! When Manhattan's looking at me, his left is over here. When he swims the other way, his left is on the other side. Where do I put the food??"

Each week I have to increase the amount I put into the Kids' Future Therapy Fund.